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Friday, September 29, 2006

Rethinking things

On the infertility front, I've given a lot of thought to Plan A, Plan B, Plan C, etc. You know it don't you? The whole routine of "Well, if this doesn't work, we'll do that. And if that doesn't work, we'll try that over there."

On the grand scheme of things, Adoption doesn't figure too highly in the hierarchy of my plans. Now don't get me wrong, I think adoption is a wonderful thing, and for those who do it, I applaud you. I think adopting a child is an extremely selfless act and I believe that anyone who undertakes adopting a child is so very blessed.

Somewhere in my selfish brain though, I think that, "Well, if hubby had two children before, we can do it again. Somehow. Someway. We will be able to have a biological child of our own." So I am pursuing those options first. In Canada, those seem to be much cheaper as well. Adoption DOES figure on my hierarchy list, but as I said, not very high.

That is... I thought it didn't.

But as we progress down this road, my brain is opening up to other things, other options, other possibilities. Adoption isn't impossible. It isn't easy, but it isn't impossible.

And then I read a blog today; The Vacant Uterus (http://vacantuterus.blogspot.com/). And I cried. I sat here at my desk, in my office (yeah yeah, I'm at work; so shoot me) and cried. The pictures of those beautiful children. The smiles on their faces. The hope in their eyes. The adoration for the "foreign visitors" who'd visited them in their orphanage in Peru. And the description of the little boy who literally ran to this blogger's husband as if drawn to him, "He made a beeline for (hubby's) bright yellow fleece pullover, as though (hubby) were the sun and he a planet caught in (his) orbit." I wept.

Adoption; it just moved higher on the list of options. Thanks to her blog, I might delve into this one sooner that previously expected.

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